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From the Pastor&
* You will act like a Christi, or I will slap the snot out of you. -- Vera Carp of Tuna, Texas
* "Everything in God's order is on the bottom shelf - you have to get on your knees to get it." -- Robert Collier
* For Jesus, the greatest sin one could commit was to cause children to stumble. -- Bishop Melvin Talbert
The Jewish high holy days Prayerbook includes this rebuke/exhortation:
Each second we live is a new and unique moment of the universe, a moment that was never before and will never be again - and what do we teach our children? We teach them that two and two is four, and that Paris is the capital of France. When will we teach them what they are? We should say to each of them, "Do you know what you are? You are a marvel! You are unique. In all of the world there is no other child exactly like you. In the millions of years that have passed there has never been another child like you& And when you grow up, can you harm another who is like you, a marvel? You must cherish one another - we all must work - to make this world worthy of its children.
To tell you the truth, I really try to treat each child at St. John's as a "STAR." Children are not PROPERTY. They are miracles in our lives. How do we teach children their uniqueness? We need to do it while they are very young. As they grow older each year, there is that desire for conformity with peers. And those of us who are the elders of the community know what conformity did to us, to our uniqueness!
Your children shouldn't get the leftovers, but the first fruits of your time and energy. There is a book, How to Win Grins and Influence Little People, which offers good suggestions like:
-- Out of the blue, mail your child an invitation to ice cream and bowling, or popcorn and a video. Kids love mail, and it shows them you think they are special all the time.
-- Leave an outgoing message on your answering machine that callers have reached the home of [your name] and their incredibly talented son/daughter [your child's name].
-- Out of the blue, say, "I'm so fortunate to be your dad/mom."
-- Put a note of praise in a bottle and float it in your child's bathwater.
-- Snuggle in bed together and listen to an old-time radio mystery or comedy in the dark.
-- Use notes, funny postcards, and letters as opportunities to put your pride in writing.
-- Catch your child's eyes across a crowded room or on the playing field and give him or her a wink and the thumbs-up sign.
-- Leave a note on the bathroom mirror: "Good morning, [your child's name]. What a fine smile you have!"
I'm sure you can come up with a list of 52 things to do for your little marvel. One a week is not too much.
And what about the telephone? Never call home at the end of the day when you're tired and crabby. Call what you're at your best or when the kids need you the most. Call just after they get home from school and remind them that they are special to you - more important than your job& and they should be! If you are out of town, call them before they go to bed so you can pray with them.
There is a time to pinch pennies and there are times to throw pennies to the wind. When it comes to talking to your kids, don't be a penny pincher!
Your home is a little church. Make it a place of love and fun. Your kids will remember growing up forever!!!
From your pastor who was never a parent but wished he had the opportunity and privilege,
Fr. Bill
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